The excitement of the pool and the urge to dive was making it really difficult for the child to follow the pool safety rules. Excited and bounding with energy, the child worked on some new moves for a few minutes and then she proceeded to dive again in the shallow area.

After the first time I observed this asked kindly that the child find either a new swim move to do in that section or choose a deeper section in which to dive. Recently at the swimming pool, one of the children I was looking after decided to do some diving in an area of the pool that was very shallow. Here is an example of how Time In can work: *It gives parent and children an opportunity to talk about the real issue at hand *children don’t feel isolated, shamed or scared *parents don’t feel out of control or create a power struggle to keep child in the time out. *children are given time to properly process a range of feelings *there can be connection between parent and child before a correction is presented *children are likely to feel that their needs are being considered Reasons Time IN or positive time out works: The time in gives you the opportunity to really connect and then address whatever change needs to be made. It doesn’t mean that you must let your child continue with a behavior that is inappropriate. The Positive parenting tool called time IN or positive time out is when a child that is having a difficult moment is kindly invited to sit somewhere, near by a care giver to express their feelings and eventually cool down.ĭuring the time in, parents are encouraged to empathize with the child’s feelings and often just quiet connection is all that is needed until the storm has passed. There are many alternatives to Time Out and one of these alternatives is the Time IN: *You get angrier and angrier as you struggle to get your child to quiet down so you can start the timer. *When you find yourself using time out for the same offense over and over again. * You feel the need to place your child in time out for every thing they are dong “wrong”. *When the child is running away at the mention or threat of time out. *When the child is in time out she repeatedly asks when she can get up. *You feel the need to place your child in time out daily, sometimes hourly. Some clues that time out is not actually working:

Often, time outs lead to more power struggles. Just know that timeouts do not actually help children learn to regulate their emotions or help them learn moral values like right from wrong. Time outs are vastly popular and are preferred to harsher traditional discipline tactics like spanking. Often parents are told to withhold attention and ignore any cries or requests from the child when using a time out.Īlthough the time out tactic can potentially prevent a behavior from occurring in the moment it can also make children feel abandoned, rejected, frightened and confused. The traditional time out is when a child is told to go somewhere (like a chair or facing a wall), alone for a determined number of minutes. Let’s look at the differences between time out and time in: What sets the positive tools apart from punitive discipline is not only the way in which they are presented to the child but also the intent (non punitive) and aim of the parents in using the tools. Sometimes positive discipline tools can seem similar to the traditional discipline tactics. What is the difference between a time out and time in? Is one better than the other?

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